Wed Stuff.

  

I cant remember who likes Indian stuff,but,when I was doing this entry,I thought of Her.

Good evening all,

I hope everyone is having a good one.Man,I must of been tired.I didnt take a nap right away when I came home.I got online and checked out all of my alerts.Than,I finally fell alseep.When I woke up,it was 5:00.It felt good to actullay sleep. I was in a deep sleep.I still can sleep tonight.I am probllay just wiped out.It was a rough day,getting up so early and not starting work till 6.It was nice that my Boss picked me up this moring at 4 and I didnt punch in till 6.But I wont do that often.Menaing,going in that early.LOL.

I am a little frustated that I might not be getting enough hours next week.I know I need a break,but,not that much of a brek.I will have Sat and Sun off this week and Fri and Sat off next week.Unless I get called into work.I know my Mom wont be happy about that.I wanted this Sunda off,but,I am not telling Her I have off  Sunday till later in the evening on Sat.LOL.Dont know if I want to tell Her about next week either.I mean,sheesh,I still have to think about christmas and other things.what am I going to do?I guess I will try and not worry about it.Even thoe,I am still worying about so many other things.

To be honest I still think about hating myself,I honestly dont know why.Ok,maybe I know why,I am just not wanting to admit alot of things,that,I know I need to do to make me a better and happy person.Let me tell you it hurts,it hurs to think about that all the time,even when I am working.I think about it all day.I want so many things to change,I just dont know how.I know I would be a happy person if I moved out.But,also,apart of me is scared.Scared about alot of things.I just feel like I am messed up and dont know how to get myself in order.Plus,worrying about getting Christmas done,I have Doctor bills to still get payed for.I know it could be alot worse.I am just kinda strugling.How to make me happy,I dont know.But I want to work on it.I have a written Journal,other than my Online Journal,I just started on,its kinda working out.But not a whole lot.Its just so much easy to write things down in here.LOL.

I cant wait till tommrow,I am so looking forward to going over to m Sisters,having thanksgiving with them,with my Brother and His family comming over.It will be nice to sit down with them and having a good meal.I will tell you,I love thanksgiving,its my fave Holiday,above all of the rest.I love the good company and all the good food,helping myself to 2nds.LOL.I hope to get some pics in.I wish I knew how to work my Digtal onto my Lap Top,I would get alot of pics in here.How ever,my Bis Brother has my Digtal,I hope I get back tommrow.So,I will probllay just use my cell phone,which is pretty good.I love to have a good Turkey Sandwhich with,you got to have Cranberry Sauce on top,yes,you said it.It sooooooo goooooood.Anyways,I am going to get off of here and get a few things done.My Sister,Her Hubby and the kids will be comming to eat after church.have a good evening all.Be safe and warm out there peaceout.