Good morig all,
I hope you all are having a good one.I dont know what is worng with me.I feel like all I am ever doing in my Journal is complaining how I am hurting.Is it in my mind?I do know that I hurt.But,I am finally relizing and looking at my Journal,it is so sad.I dont want to be like this.I want to be a happy person with good and postaive thoughts.I did wake up this moring feeling sore with my knees.I think I over did it yesterday with walking.I was not using the wheel chair and I wanted to walk.I did use the scooter at Tagert yesterday.Please forgive me for being so negative lately.I am very ashamed of how I am acting.I dont like the way I have been.I should be so blessed that I am not more worse off than other people are more than I am.Did I put thoes words right?I hope so.
I will be sitting down this moring,well,I am sitting down now.LOL.I am going to write the letter to my Doctor and will tell him,please read this.I just cant belive the way I have been.I cant even look myself in the mirro.I am suspised you all didnt leave and say,this is just a depressing Journal.I dont want it to be.I want to be happy.I am really glad I will be going to the Pain Doc next Tuesday.I dont want to be on anymore pills after this week.I am dapendent on them.If I want to make things change I have to force myself to do that.But you know,I have been taking my Arthitis shots,they have been helping.So,now,I dont know if I will need to have Surgey or not.Well,the Orthopedic says I do.But we will see when I go Thursday.
You all are such a blessingto me.I just cant belive how bad I let things get to me.I lost all intrest in things I loved doing.Well,not anymore,I am tired of the depression taking over my body.I want that happy person back in my life again.I cant belive it has taken me this long to relize.I know it will be hard.But I am going to force myself from now on,taking it step by step to doing the things I love doing.Like writting,I havent felt like writting in a long time,letters and I need to.I am going to do that today.Anyways,I just thank you all for sticking by this sad and depressing person.But no more.I shouldnt say no more,because,it wont be easy.But I want to change.I love you all so much and thank you all so much.I do hope you all will have a great day.Be safe and warm out there.Peaceout.
10 comments:
{{Amanda}}
We wouldn't leave your journal = we love you! Pain is depressing - I know that first hand.
You are in pain - its not easy to be ms. cheerful when you are in pain yet in every journal entry that I write - you always have something positive and sweet to say to me. And I see your comments in other people's journals too!!! No matter how much pain you are in - you always have something uplifting and sweet to say to someone else. Now that says a lot for your character!!!
You are a great person - I pray that you find the right medicine for your pain.
Love,
Michelle
I may not always comment! BUT I do read! I would never leave!
your in my thoughts!
Sharon
Now I have found you I wont leave ,and I love the hugs you leave in my journal ,perhaps you could tell the Doctor you have been feeling like this ,and yes a good idea to write it down if you feel you cant say it ,Ialways leave the Drs thinking ''oh I should have said that ''lol ...love Jan xx
Hi hugs!!!!
listen if it helps to put into writting how you feel then DO IT. I know what it feel like to be in pain and not much you can do about it. we still love ya' ....I was serious about calling me if you want to. I will be there for you!
just let me know your phone # so I will not think it is a sales call.
Love ya'
Patty
It's hard to think (or write) about anything else but pain when you are in pain. I know it's not easy Amanda, but try to focus on other things if you can. Try writing about your childhood or stories about your parents or grandparents. It might help to get your mind into a less depressing state. I worry about you Sweetie.
Hugs and Love, Joyce
My mother hurt all the time. She said she did not feel like going any place because who could go some place while hurting. My daughter Terry Ann hurts all the time too. It is not fun to hurt all the time. It is your journal... so write what you want. :-) I am so sorry that you are hurting. Have been keeping you in my prayers. Praying that the doctors will have you fixed up in no time at all. Sure sounds like you will need surgery. I know a lot of people who have gotten their knees fixed and they are so happy now without the pain. Prayers and hugs, Janie
Don't worry...we will be here for ya~! Take care of yourself and hope that pain management can help you :) Hang in there Mandy!
Sending you lots of hugs like you send everyone else!!
Missie
Glucosamine/chondroitin for arthritis is a miracle-
Good luck at your Doctors-
and underneath all your pain -you are still that sweet gal we all care about...you complain all you want -it's good to get it out-if people don't like it they can 'move on'
big hugs dear gal
Awwwwwww Mandy, you are such a sweet person, I am so sorry that you are in such pain, wish I could wish it away for you, please know that I care, Hugs Lisa (((((((((((((((((((( Mandy ))))))))))))))))))))))
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