Good moring all,
Hope you all had a better weekend that I had.I am so tired,all I want to really do right now is just sleep,maybe I can alseep my whole life away.I know,not happening.Sat,I worked 7 hours,was susposed to get off at 5,but,as usllay,the person who comes in on Sats,always calls out,when it is nice out,I am tellling you,She can get away with it and I dont understand it.Shes only got 2 days a week.If She calls out this Sat,I am not commin in.I am off,cant belive I am off,but,I am off.I feel I need a vaction from work.Maybe I should take a few days off next week.well,wait,I get that anyways.I am just depressed with work,bringing it home with me and worrying about it all the time.
Right now,I could use a change in my life,how do I go about doing that?I dont know.I cant quit my job,I need that,it is my life line,I know,I said that before.I havent been taking my meds regulary and just started this moring to take them,maybe that will help.But to be honest with you,I do need a change in my life and just dont know what that is.I need something to make me feel good inside and I havent been feeling good inside,that is what I need.Sat when I got off of work my ankel hurt so bad,that all I could do was come home and get off of it.Its a little swolen,but,I think thats also because I havent had my shots.I am so messed up right now,its not even funny.And I got a bill I have to call my insurance company because they arent covering it.Its from the Labcorp and they said that I didnt have to have theeses tests done,but,the Doctor wanted me to have them done.He should of checked through my insurance first before telling me about this.It came to 702,that is my bill.I cant pay for that and I am not going to.I just have been so stressed out about everything in my life right now and nothing seems to be going right.
I keep hoping and praying things will get better,well,I have been trying to pray more,just feel like I have given up.What ever shall I do?But,seriously,do you think I should take a few days off of work?wait a munite,like I keep on saying,I already get that,but,I need to refresh my mind,my body,my spirit.this room of mine is a mess,I am tired of looking at it.I wish I could just get away from this world of mine,but,probllay not going to happend.Worrying is hopless,right?So,than why should I worry?Maybe God is trying to tell me something.I havent even been wanting to do another journal,like I been wanting to.Cant seem to find any engry on doing that.Somethings gotta give.Anyways,I know,I have rambles on enough about my problems that are probllay useless.lol.I do want you all to know,that I care about you all and pray about each and everyone of you.Last night,I was so tired from everything,that I wanted to do an entry,but,didnt have it in me,so,I fell alseep.I did get somewhat of a good night sleep.But I could use a whole day of rest.lol.Anyways,I will stop now while I am ahead.I could probllay go on and on and on and on and on again.lol.I hope you all will have a nice week ahead,hope and pray things go your way.Be safe and kool/warm out there.Peaceout till now.
6 comments:
cannot read a single word of this it's all too dark
Cindy
I would not ask you to do this either, but I am having a very difficult time reading this entry Amanda, and I truly want to read all of it. Hope you have a lovely Monday...will come back and try again, a bit later...love you!!!
Joyce
Why dont you go get your hair colored or get your toe nails done. That always makes me feel good! Work will get better, just stay positive, and keep smiling.
Kelli
http://journals.aol.com/kamdghwmw/noonmom
Sorry you are having a lot of problems at the moment. It is hard to make lots of decisions but try to make one, which will probably help the stress. Hugs, Terry x
I think you need a spa day...a day to call it "all about Amanda"...you deserve it.
Hope your ankle feels better....many hugs Amanda...love the tags and you too!
Joyce
I hope things do improve and that you start feeling happier. Its difficult when a person is feeling depressed and does not know why.
It is very warm here today but may storm tonight and then will be cooling off getting down to freezing in the mornings and in the low 50's F during the days. I had been unable to sit at the computer for a long time because of my back pain. I have an appointment to see a back surgeon. I need to have a lumbar stenosis or narrowing of the spine repaired as it is putting pressure on my spinal cord. I do a lot of reading on my board/cushion on my back as that is the only way I can concentrate. I will get around to the journals a little at at time. Thanks for visiting and viewing my photo! mark
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